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I have been working to fix my weight my whole life. My body doesn't even enjoy food any more. I don't even really think about eating. I am never really hungry. I get craving once in a blue moon but that is it. I eat what is in front of me when people put it there cause I don't want them to think something is wrong with me. I don't really care about that right now. I know that everyone I have cared about just uses me for one thing or another and I am tired of it. I am going to fix my life I am going to loose the damn weight even if I have to stop eating completely and work out everyday. I am never going to let people take advantage of me again I am going to stop helping people just to be nice I am going to really try to be like everyone else and just look out for myself. I will slowly remove the people who have used me out of my life and then I will be truely alone.